Recovery Reading 07/03/24: Don’t Take Alcoholism Personally

It’s about them, not you

AI art created by author on Night Cafe

Without a basic understanding of alcoholism as a disease, it’s easy to feel like the alcoholic behavior is something being done TO YOU instead of being a reflection of the disease manifesting THROUGH your qualifier, ie, the person who landed you in Al-Anon. It’s easy to become the victim of an alcoholic if you don’t have all the information or methods of protecting yourself, and that’s what you’ll get at Al-Anon meetings.

Alcoholism is a real bona fide disease. It’s the only disease that strikes individuals on mental, physical, and spiritual levels at the same time. The alcoholic doesn’t do what they do to attack you; alcohol essentially “attacks” them by hijacking their body, mind, and spirit. It drives them to say and do things they wouldn’t say or do in their right, ie, sane selves.

I hated my alcoholic dad for a long time — the broken promises, the slurred speech, the unpredictable behavior, and more — because I thought he was doing all these things to me on purpose. I knew he drank. A lot. But I didn’t understand the connection between the alcohol and the craziness of the man I called “dad.”

Then I started attending Al-Anon meetings, where I learned that my dad had a disease that I didn’t cause, I couldn’t control, and I…