Step 3: Give Up Control? I Don’t Think So!

Giving up control confers greater control

Photo by Raul Varzar on Unsplash

Step 3: Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.

In our egocentric society — in which everything is about our control and/or other people’s control, e.g., trying to remove it or empower it — this concept of giving up control is practically unheard of.

I say “practically” because most 12-steppers have either given over their control or are contemplating doing so. Wrestling with this step is halfway to taking it. And as we saw in my recent story on Step 2, the world mass of 12-steppers is pretty darn large. Yet we remain in the minority overall.

Made a decision

To take this step, we first make a decision. However, just because we decided to do something doesn’t mean we’ve done it. A lot of people panic at this point in the 12-step process because they assume that the words “making” and “taking” are synonymous. But they’re not. Many people sit on that decision for some time, waiting for evidence of this so-called “Higher Power” mentioned in the 12-step meetings and literature.

And that’s not a bad thing to do. If you’re going to jump into the void, it’s best to make sure there’s something to catch you or at least punt…